18 November 2009

"Am I reaching for the stars? I don't think so."

Kids these days don't know how to shop for clothes that properly fit them! Then again, when you wear your jeans halfway down your ass you're entering a whole new world of sizing which I am not familiar with! Should we start buying jeans whose waist measurement equals the diameter of our derrieres? I also think the most common offender of the 'fit' rule is the person who can not understand the difference between something that fits well and something that is just plain old tight.
If I can see your midriff, the shirt is too short. You aren't a cokewhore and this isn't the nineties. Same thing in the back... if I can see your entire lower back, it's too short. There's no problem with flashing a little bit of skin, but if I can count your vertebrae, there's a problem.

If a shirt clings to fat rolls on your torso, shit's too tight, son. Ladies- jersey is a fickle friend. Wear it right, you'll knock em dead. Wear it wrong, it will draw attention to all the wrong places.

Skin-tight jeans on men are a statement piece, not a staple piece for everyday use. And if I can see the boys downstairs, your pants are too tight.

Ladies, ladies, ladies.... I am by no means a Victorian but please, leave some things to the imagination. When you're wearing shorts in the dog days of summer, they shouldn't be similar to spandex in fit and they shouldn't come all the way up to your ass. Same thing for dresses. Find the perfect length for your legs which is both flattering and sexy but doesn't show off your kooch when you walk.

So please, people, don't rush into buying something that doesn't fit well. Make sure you spend that extra thirty seconds looking at yourself in the mirror. And always check how your body can move while wearing a garment before deciding to buy it. There is no sense in buying nice clothes and carefully constructing a look if it doesn't fit the right way!

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